my dad is the greatest man I have ever seen and will venture to say ever heard of... The other day I was told the most hurtful news...
my dad has prostate cancer... and it has spread to his bones... my LIFE in a matter of a couple of days has not been the same since and never will. everything looks and seems different to me. Suddenly the things that mattered don't and the small things are the only things that DO. smiles, hugs, kisses..
i am confident that he will be ok, my heart is just shattered in a million pieces seeing such a wonderful man hurting. Of course he's not showing that he's hurting much, but I know he's hurting and it's hurting us. And even still he is trying to inspire me by saying "the way you are calling these doctors trying to get a sooner appointment for me, you should be just as adamant about getting your work out there". i agreed.
Nobody ever prepares you for things like this. Why would you think something like this would happen to someone that is almost perfect? A man that makes it his business to teach us lessons from everyday things that happen, has never abandoned his family, loves his wife with everything he is, has always been uplifting, helpful, inspiring, STRONG ...
My week has been as follows:
Thursday morning: sitting on pins and needles waiting for his results... calling my mom every 20 minutes hoping it was anything other than cancer...
Thursday Afternoon: told the news I never wanted to hear... When I heard the words, I felt like I was not here anymore... nothing felt real... Immediately burst out in tears...
Thursday Evening: rushed to my parent's house with my husband & kids... consoled my mom who is dealing with being told her soul mate ( that she's been with since she was 15 ) has cancer (cancer took her mom when she was in her 50's). Hugged my dad as he rushed home from work... He looked @ us (my oldest sister, my mom and I) and said "What is this, a wake?? I'm still here and we're going to beat this" My other sister walked in with a "red" face and he told us all if we were going to cry that we'd have to stand outside with our coats off...
Thursday night: laid with my parents, kids, sisters, nieces, nephews and talked about it... My aunt & sister gathered our entire family on the phone and we all prayed. There were about 20 of us. I went home around midnight and cried myself to sleep.. Again, it felt so unreal... like I would wake up and it was all just a nightmare.
Friday morning: Woke up @ 6:30 am, took Boopity to school. Came home and called 15-20 Urologist offices to try and get my father a sooner appointment than Tuesday... The best anyone could do was Monday.. he decided to stick with Tuesday. I immediately researched what he should eat and found a cookbook by David Ricketts. "Eat to Beat Prostate Cancer". Spoke to my mom, dad & sister. My sister and dad decided they wanted to document everything that was going on so that when he recovers he can look back at his story and share it. I still felt the same... hurt, distraught, confused, sad...
Friday afternoon: Picked up Boopity and headed back to my parent's house. Took my parents to the grocery store (needed my dad to get out of the house) to pick up the ingredients for his new diet. While at the store I could see my father go in and out of deep thought. I don't know what he was thinking about, but I can only imagine what was going through his mind.
Friday Night: Cooked meals for him. (dinner, breakfast, lunch and more dinner). Watched movies with him. My sister videoed.
This is pretty much how the days have been going. On Saturday my friend gave us water that was given to her by her father who is a pastor. She said God told him to give it to his church and whatever they ask for, he'll give it. She gave us some of the water and we drank it. Sunday was a much happier day for us all. Little crying, lot's of smiles.
i know many that have survived cancer { my aunt kareen, cousin joyce & others } and it has taken others that i love from us { my grandmother, my grandfather (shortly after being given a clean bill of health after battling prostate cancer he passed of a heart attack) my grandfather in law }
But my dad.... cancer won't take him from us... this is just a new beginning, to see things differently, change the way we do things... it took me a moment to decide if i was going to publish this because of how personal it is. but my dad wants to document his recovery and this is just part of it.
roads in DC weren't too bad!
she must have said something she thought was funny, but he didn't!
They rushed us to write our names I couldn't even write my complete last name!
wonder what she's thinking about...
they heart eachother
she's acting shy now about taking pictures... she forgets that I've seen all her photo albums and "strike a pose" pictures from when she was younger. AND she's told me plenty of times "woooo woo, when I was your age {30} I was unstoppable! everyone had their eyes on me!"
I let my mom snap this shot and I specifically told everyone it was going to come out like this... a shot of the entire room, not just us
i love this man :-) The best father anyone could ask for
sample from my Lunchbox Magazine editorial.. seems appropriate as a message for Haiti as well... 